This will be a short entry but deep in my opinion.
I have let my personal insecurities hold me back from being consistent at doing what I love. As I was having our family meeting with my wife on Sunday at 7. We were reviewing something we rated together as a couple last meeting. We rated it 1-10. 10 perfectly happy and and 1 not happy at all. Communication was a 4 and this have always been something we said we need to work on but I have not done anything to make this happen. No more excuses! We also found a verse to help us focus on our communication efforts on kingdom values.
There were a lot of other category but I wanted to talked about one specifically today. Emotions!!
When it came to rate from 1-10, Shania was a 10 and I was a 5. When I am referring to emotions and marriage let this definition sit with you first. Emotions is a intuitive feeling as distinguished from reasoning or knowledge.
I always think about intuitive as that gut feeling, which can be trained to response in any way you choose. I had ever reason to believe my wifey fully love me and expresss that in our marriage and that’s why her emotions level is at a 10. So I sat back and asked myself why, why I am at the halfway point and she is fully charged? I have done well to service my wife so what am I missing that she is not giving me? Wrong questions. Here a better question, what am I allowing myself not to see because I am blocking the answer with my emotions.
Mel Robbins, from the 5 second rule, said something I believe to be every true and I will paraphrase. “Extroverts tend to come across as very confidence people, but they are really insecure and I was one of them.” I would agree with her 100% because there are times I don’t believe in myself. As hard as it is to admit I know this is the truth for me. So when you have a doubting mentally about yourself it is much easier to blame others then take responsibility for your own flaws.
Well this is he main reason I would want to give my wife a 5. Because that is how I feel about when it came to our emotional level in our marriage, but the truth is that it was really me.
When you doubt yourself so much you will start to doubt others as well. I have an amazing beautiful wife that crazy about and it is not one women on this earth that can replace her. So maybe I will dig deeper into my personal insecurities later, but to notice and accept is the first step.
Until tomorrow, what’s your self talk? #wyst?